Hilarous!

Ok, this morning, Monday October 20th I went out into my woods behind my house.

As the sun comes up, I see 3 doe about 80 yards away, coming my way. I still have to fill a doe tag, and the drag was literally 300 yards to my back door. So I figure what the heck, might as well fill it now, since I have the chance.

The doe come to within 25 yards, and I get ready for a shot.

BOOM, like thunder.

I let one rip so loud, so invasive, so interrupting. I've never seen deer run that fast. I couldn't stop laughing. I almost fell outta my hanger. The scent was bearable, but I really couldn't stop laughing, I had to get down.


Just figured you guys would like that. Me killing my buck and being the new babe winkleman know it all now, I ruined my hunt, because I just had to have 300lbs of cajun flavored french fries last night!

Here's a funny story during the 2006 rut.
 
Dad was about 200 yards from me.  It was about 10:30 am and for whatever reason, he took his release off (?) and was about to get down.  I farted SO loud, I knew he had to have heard it.  I got on the walkie talkie, and asked if he heard it.  LOL  He says, no, but then says yes.  A bit confused I asked again and again and again.  He said yes a bunch of times then I heard "Son of a bit$%."
 
All this time, he thought I was asking if he heard the 8 pt. coming at him.  He kept replying yes, but I was actually talking about the sound coming out of my****  In the process of answering me he dropped his release on the treestand platform, and away the buck went.  That's where the "son of a bit$%" come from.
 
 
Last year, he tried to get down before $hitting his pants, made it to about 8 feet, unbuckled the harness and slid down the tree with his pants down, $hitting all over the place.
 
 
 
I need to stay away from him this year.

A couple years ago, I got virus that gave me the runs worse than i've ever had before, or since. The worst part was, I had it during the first day of rifle season. I typically hunt out of a climber, and should have known better than to climb it when I was sick. It wasn't even daylight yet, when I heard sounds coming from my stomach that sounded like thunder, followed by a cat growling. I immediatly started the climbing down process, knowing what that sound meant, since I heard the same sound an hour or 2 earlier and had to run back upstairs to the throne, just before I left the house, but not before I got completely ready to go having my insulated pants, coat, and harness on. Anyway, not only did I have to climb down the tree in a climber, but I had to get my harness off, in order to drop my pants. Luckily, I did all this just in time to avoid the redicule I would have dealt with from my friends/family for pooping my pants. I don't know it if was the noise I made while climbing down, or sounds of me struggling to get the harness off, but I know I spooked some deer in the cornfield nearby, because I heard a snort, then the sound of something crashing through the corn. Oh well, at least I didn't poop my pants.

here's a good one me my dad and my uncle were hunting behind his house in elizabeth deer season and it was a little after lunch when we saw him running down his hill to his house i had no idea why he was running after a couple hours we didnt see him so we went down to the house and my aunt was laughn and sais my uncle had ran to the house and told her to open the garage door really quickly she figured he had shot something he wasnt allowed to and she opened the door and he was like i **** my pants i gotta change and he couldnt make it back up the hill because his stomache was a mess lmao i will never forget that story

1)When I was a teenager in camp another hunter crapped over a log on a brutal cold day and he was in a hurry to get his warm clothes back on. Too bad he had a one piece suit with a hood which caught it. He returned with crap on the back of his neck and down his back. It was really funny after the smell left. No, it was me.
 
2)Hunting camp again when I was 13- there was a first time hunter there who was 28 years old and a friend of the owners son(who convinced him to go and it was a great time). He had a trick played on him for 3 consecutive days. He was told Sunday night that there was a guy on a quad that delivered cold lunches/meals to different locations for the first 3 days of buck. We all placed fake orders for ham and cheese sandwiches, PB&J, snacks, etc. then told where our location would be in the woods out back of the camp and general time we would be there. A fake phone call was made for the order with no one on the other end of the line and money was even taken from him, ours of course was returned later quietly.
 
Monday evening he shows up ****ed complaining he never got his food. A phone call was made to a camp down the road for one of the guys there to act as the delivery guy. When the new guy said he wanted to talk to him later on- they made another call to the other camp. Some excuse was made but all new orders were taken again for Tuesday. Money again changed hands.
 
Tuesday evening he comes in really ****ed now because he has gone 2 days without lunch, now threatening to go to the guys house and have a talk with him. Another phone call is made to the camp down the street and the new hunter starts yelling wanting to know where was the food delivery. The fake delivery guy says" Well, you weren't where you were supposed to be and I waited 5 minutes for you at the grapevines. Couldn't you hear my quad running?" And somehing to the effect,"I know these woods like the back of my hand."  He convinces the new hunter to take one more try and he'll return all his money for the two days and even give him a free lunch on Wednesday. He agrees but packs a lunch just in case.
 
Wednesday evening he comes back in at dark and is a raving lunatic, cussing and threatening bodily harm to the absent delivery man. Everyone just couldn't hold it in any longer and just started laughing. The guy didn't get it at first because it was too elaborate of a trick, I guess. Man, he was gullible.

ORIGINAL: jlh42581


I stood up and showed him my junk and he got intimidated and ran the other way.

 
Or he not want to laugh and embarass you ?
 
 
ha
 
This past weekend was fun.   Did a long walk to a good spot.  Found a scrape, fresh deer poop in it.  ****ed in it.  About 6:15, heard what sounded like a buck rubbing a tree.  Hit the grunt call a few times.  Saw two moving "things" in the brush about 30 yards away.  Up the tree went the cub, didn't get to see moma bear.
 
Anyway, left my treestand there.  Took a nice wet poop when I got to the top of the ridge (about 350 yards from my tree).  Something ****ed in the scrape from when I left to 6:30 or so..  I ended up squirting one all over the striped maple below me once I got up the tree.  Looked like Mexican Queso.  So much for that spot .. he was a slammer buck.

Poopin' really ruins spots.   Dad does it every year.  Everytime we scout and find some big rubs or great sign, he poops.   Perhaps it's from getting excited?  I don't know but it's like clockwork..  Just these past two years, the apple hasn't fallen far from the tree.   We always make sandwiches for the the last week and hunt all day... I think I can concur that white bread makes me poop a bunch.  I got the first week to myself this year.  As long as I don't poop too much, I should see some deer.   Maybe I need to get a scent crock jacket and poop in it?   Dad is hunting the second week!!  yikes!!   I better shoot one before the second week or I'm screwed.

Be leary of baggies. A buddy of mine had to pee & didn't want to get out of his stand. He pulled out a ziploc baggie from his pocket, watched around him for deer & let 'er flow. Then, he felt a warm sensation on his leg. He looked down & there was a hole in the corner of the baggie & he peed all over himself.

the problem is when you fill the bottle and are not done...lol been there.
 
I also have seen the crap in the hood, that one is a classic!

All this poop talk sure is better than that AR/HR crap (pun intended).

I did a super long walk two Novembers ago, and pooped on my safety harness.  I stayed on the ground and couldn't see 5 feet!

I know a guy who used his orange vest to wipe his arse during late muzzleloader season. After he was done, he covered the vest and poo with leaves, and eventually walked back to his car. While he was getting ready to leave, another guy came out of the woods and said "look what I found...an orange vest". The guy put it in his truck and drove away. I wonder how long it took him to figure out why it was so dirty.