trouble landing steelhead

First thing to consider are all the hook ups fair or foul hooks.  I see many people setting the hooks and fight the fish only to realize they have the fish hook in the tail or belly or fin...etc...  Foul hooked fish are very tough to land.  You really cannot control them properly and will be lucky to get them in.
 
If your hook up is in the mouth, a couple of things might help.  First, try to let the fish run for awhile.  The old saying is a steelie has at least three good runs.  As you bring them in to shore, they will feel the gravel on their belly and take off.  Be ready for the run.  Let them go.  Once they slow down, start applying the pressure again.  The key here is to have a good drag on your reel.  Too often people try fishing for steelies with cheap reels with lousy drag systems.  A good drag is a must and it must be set properly, not too tight.   Also, DO NOT reel while the fish is taking line.  If you reel while line is coming off the reel, you will be putting a major twist in your line and end up with a big mess. 
 
Another thing to keep in mind, don't let the fish get too far away from you.  When they take off on a run, follow them.  Walk down the stream and stay close.  A big mistake I see is people standing in one place and letting the fish run down into fast water.  This usually will end with a break off or the hook coming out.  Keep up with the fish.
 
Try not to use too large of a hook.  This may sound strange, but you will have less problems with fish spitting out a small hook than a large one, especially a large streamer hook.  Be sure to use at least 2x strong hooks.  I have seen steelies straighten out a hook and spit it.
 
Dont' try to use to light of a tippet.  There really is no need to go less than say 4 lb test or 4X tippet. Some guys will tell you need ultra light material, you really don't.  Use the heaviest that will still give you a good drift.
 
Check your tippet material frequently and change it often.  The rocks and slate will put small cuts and nicks in the tippet or leader material.  Also make sure you are tying good knots.  An improved clinch knot is a good knot that usually will not come undone.  The palomar knot is a great knot as well.
 
When fighting the fish, try to keep its head up.  The idea is to control where the fish is going, not letting the fish decide.  Apply pressure from different angles to keep the fish off guard and use side pressure as much as possible.  Don't drag the fish, but rather guide it. 
 
Be aware of underwater structure that you line may be getting caught on.  As the fish runs, it can wrap your line around rocks, logs and other obstructions which can break your line.  Also, fish swimming back and forth over the edge of a slate shelf can lead to your line being cut or abraded.
 
Lastly, patience.  Fight the fish, be calm and don't try to horse it in.  Work it.  Give and take as it runs and always keep the pressure on it, but don't over do it. 
 
With some practice you will get the hang of landing the steelies.  Good luck.

Well there's always the russian method:  Snag them with 20# test and have a friend standing by with a big net and a small baseball bat to whack em with.

ur not missing anything.they arent good eating anyway

The snag and grab method is effective.  Not only will you land your fish, but you might also land a nice fine...  I am sure Brook would be more than happy to write you up and maybe even take you off to a comfortable room at the Erie county jail...

Get a long handled net like the russians. They always go 3/3 or 100/100.
Fair or foul hooked.

Bughawk does have some good info. something i will add concerning tippet. remember the dirtier the water the heavier the line you can use. in green or stained water it doesn't hurt to go to 8#. side pressure is very important if you want to wear them down quicker. a question i will ask is are actually trying to beach them? personally i never even land the fish. i bring them close enough to grab the fly with my forceps, and pop the hook out. i rarelly have to even touch the fish. i find it harder to control the fish out of the water rather than in the water. one other thint you might want to remember, a problem i see with many people. try not to let the fish be down stream from you if you can. if that fish is down stream looking upstream at you, your basically pulling the hook out of its mouth. if you inverse that and you are down stream and the fish is upstream the hook will be pulled back towards the fish. that also gives you more leverage against the fish, as he is fighting you and the current. before you are the one fighting him and the current. just some things to think about.

Matt4:19,
 
Basically the proper etiquette is to yell, "Fish On" when you hook a fish and which direction the fish is moving, "Coming Down" or "Coming Up".  Most guys will step back and let you by.  In fact, when fishing an area with a lot of people it is expected that you will pull your line out of the water while someone is fighting a fish so as to not entangle their line and to back up to let them pass. It is very bad form to continue to fish while someone is fighting a fish.  Also, if you can, I find it best to try to move the fish out of the main hole and deal with it away from the crowd.  This is not always possible.
 
If you are worried about loosing your spot if you move down or up stream to land a fish, most people will let you back to where you were without any problems.  Of course there are always a few rude people who will step into your "honey hole" the split second you move out and will not reqluish it, but they can be dealt with by basically standing as close as you can to them and casting back into where you had been fishing.  They will get the message. 
 
A lot of fishing in a group is about being aware of what the other fisherman are doing and responding accordingly.  I believe many problems arise when people just are totally into their fishing and don't care about anyone else.  It is not hard to fish in a group of people IF everyone pays attention to where everyone's lines are, who has a fish on, etc...

Me thinks you exaggerate a wee bit indsguiz.